2012

what a year 2011

I feel strange today... bit bizar cause I want the new year to start
2011 was a good one, for me much better than 2010
yet, I want it to be over... 2012 may start, maybe turning out to be even better than 2011

I'll try to enjoy every day to the fullest, I hope you can do this too
I wish you warm sunshine everyday, if not in the sky, in the hearts of the people you meet
I hope you have people to hug, on times you need them and for no reason at all
I wish you all a platoon of gnomes who can take over your work when you need a little bit of rest
I wish you strength when things get a bit more difficult
I hope you find reasons to smile and you will smile for no reason

in short: I wish you all a colourful 2012!!! enjoy the year!!!

unexpected colours II

mum & dad got the "colour" message and gave me for Christmas:

tadaaaaaaa

yellow and fuchsia towels :D

coincidence? no way! part III

there is no such thing as coincidence

my life is the perfect example of this

I was alone, not just only me… partially me, cause Arnout took half of me when he left

how would I survive this? do I even want to get over this? cause that means accepting the break and I didn’t want to do that

but I had to go on, and I went on as good as I could

the post-graduate year started, immediately taking a run with lectures, project works, excursions, more lectures and project works, all this in the shortest amount of time you could possibly imagine

there was even no time to doubt my choice for this course

I paid attention in class and during excursions, worked my ass off for the projects; in the mean time keeping up my social life, meeting old friends, singing in my choir, and building up a new social life, with people that would turn out to be best friends

anything was good enough to fill up that black hole around my heart that was sucking up my energy

but that black hole was also sucking up myself

I was completely forgetting myself...

so my friends (and the little voice in me) dragged me along on my quest: find me, myself and I

I went looking for me next to a drink and my friends in a bar and discovered I love going out, I love to meet new people, talk to strangers and make them think “mmm, she’s special”

I went looking for myself on a city trip to Paris, the city of love, under a warm spring sun and discovered the love of my friends completes me

I went looking for I on the study trip to Petra, Jordan, and discovered my friendship is a blessing for other people

the way to finding myself was better than I could ever imagine: new friends, new people, new self-confidence… new me

now I look upon this last year, the hardest in my life, as the greatest blessing I ever had

THESE were the greatest months of my life

this break-up happened for a reason: for me to know what I want and what I’m worth

to get stronger, you have to get through the crap

to get higher, you have to go lower

there’s more to life then you would think at first

don’t be afraid to get hurt… I know it sucks but it makes you who you are

my friends are there for me and I’m there for them

I’m free as a bird now and I enjoy life

my old friends saw me open up

my new friends saw me grow day by day

and Arnout? no clue… he might be on the other side of the world, he might have shrunk down, he might be sitting in a corner crying over me :) … I don’t really care

I attract new people in my life with a smile

nobody special, just trying to be a little ray of light in the life of other people

… the end (for now, cause I’m always open for new things)

unexpected colours I

people often amaze me in their level of "greyness"
"not too much colour, it's so... flashy"
pff

but every once in a while someone or something amazes me in a good way

the purple house, behind the Palace of the Prince-Bishop in Liège

cool :)

coincidence? no way! part II

there is no such thing as coincidence

my life is the perfect example of this

Arnout and I were made for each other, nothing could tear us apart

at least I thought so…

the last couple of months were though: hard work, no free time, thesis problems…

but what couple doesn’t have these troubles? we didn’t see each other a lot, but I could manage it…

I of course wanted more time with Arnout but there was the thesis again to distract me

it would all be better after graduation… only a couple more months/weeks/days

and there it was: graduation day J for both of us J

but it didn’t feel like I thought it would…

mmm, probably because the close future wasn’t like I suspected: he was going on a two week trip on which I wasn’t joining; after that he started a full time internship and I would go back to Leuven for a post-graduate

…

mmm, we could work it out… maybe after a small break… just a couple days of peace and thinking

two days were sufficient… for me to knew for sure we WOULD work it out

I loved him from the deepest depths of my heart and soul, we were one, we belonged together…

we would find something…

we were made for each other…

we were soulmates…

only… I was alone in that opinion…

Arnout broke up with me

we had lived happily for 2 years and 2 months

never had I experienced the pain of a real heartache

the word heartache doesn’t even do justice to what I felt

it physically hurt so much, I thought it would destroy me

I would live sadly ever after

… to be continued

coincidence? no way! part I

there is no such thing as coincidence

my life is the perfect example of this

I started to believe this about 6 years ago… small things inflicted this idea

stories of an acquaintance (a man who travelled the world along prisons and wrote a book about it, hitchhiked home with a total stranger who was reading that book), the way my cousins and friends got to know there boy/girlfriends, winning the last tickets to a concert I really wanted to go to…

coincidence? it all seemed a bit too coincidental

4 years ago, at Christmas, this all took a massive turn: I was feeling down, my boyfriend dumped me and I felt a bit lost

I was sitting at the feast table, a bit absent, but happy with the company of my family, when my cousin B. had to make an announcement for his wedding. I told him “ho, wait a second… stand up! this kind of announcements deserves the proper treatment” ;)

he stood up and at that time he gave me THE best Christmas present I ever had and ever will have: he asked me to be his maid of honour :D

as an only child and having only good friends that have more than enough brothers and sisters as possible candidates, I never expected to be a maid of honour, now I could be my cousins, my “big brother”s…

I can assure you, this kind of presents at a time you’re feeling down do not at all feel like just a present… to me, it’s was a sign

even more… my cousin-in-law-to-be R. told us her younger brother Arnout would be her best man…

Arnout ... that name… hearing that name, only his name… I felt at ease, in that degree even I could let go of everything… I knew him somehow … it felt right

some months passed, and finally in April I got to know Arnout …

never met him before, but I knew him, he knew me, we could skip the “obligatory” getting to know each others’ occupancies etc. and go directly to hours of small talk about anything and everything

we got together, the greatest months of my life

everybody that knew us together told the same story: “you are SO great together”, “one wedding inflicts another”, “you’re made for each other, you can tell”

… and actually… we were made for each other

when I was with him, I felt good, I felt complete, nothing could take us apart

this was no coincidence, it was faith

they lived happily ever after (or so would the fairy tale end)

… to be continued

the internship - part II: the governmental copy machine

situation sketch: for the 78th time in 5 weeks my across-the-corridor neighbour (and genuine stereotype ambtenaar) comes and asks me about the study of one of the palaces in Belgium
it's an unpublished study that I need for my thesis, that is THE ONLY copy in the building
now, being occupied in a full-time internship, I can't devote myself full-time to the thesis (nobody can, at least not normal people, and besides the high level of craziness, I'm still quite normal on that level)
I know, the study is there on my desk (being THE ONLY copy), staring at me and giving me the feeling of guilth BUT all in good time... I will get to it

now... Jan (genuine stereotype ambtenaar's name) comes stumbling and hobbling out of his office, standing a while in his doorway (in the mean time I typed 10 sentences, read an article and checked my e-mails) and finally says

Jan : "do you still have the study of the Egmont Palace?"
me: "yes, I still have it on my desk", thinking it's been there for weeks, no I didn't take it home

Jan: "did you copy it yet?"
me: "no, do you need it urgently?", the word urgently almost making me burst into laughter since the concept of "urgent" is NOT in an ambtenaar's dictionnary
Jan: "no no, not at all but it's THE ONLY copy"

*boom* (that was me exploding... I know by now it's the only copy)

all right, all right... I'm off to the governmental copy machine that after 2 copies gives an error

... after 2 copies
... an error

OH SCREW THAT ONLY COPY :)

in the swimming pool

a little wave and celebration to me! I went swimming!! all together 850 meters if I'm not mistaking (counting and swimming at the same time is surprisingly difficult I must say... (or maybe it is my acute disability of doing several things at once... aka THE feminin capacity is not always applicable to me))

soit...

although I can't count and swim at the same time, I was able to remember some ...ehm... phenomena:

things you come across in a swimming pool
apart from the love handles and the very questionable bathing suits (some people really look like they go buy their bathing suits blindfolded), there are other ... ehm... issues you wouldn't expect in a swimming pool

first of all: central lane drivers, sorry... swimmers
this kind of driving is quite popular on Belgian highway (the average highway has three lanes, the middle one being particularly precious to drivers who don't belong there, like they see that lane literaly as the golden mean) but of course it annoys everybody trapped behind those drivers
they apparently also appear in the swimming pool
... it's annoying...
... they block the lane...
... create a "swimmer jam"...
and of course you can't pass them cause there are swimmers coming from the other direction and I don't swim fast enough :)

secondly: ghost drivers, sorry... swimmers
the outer lane in the swimming pool is particularly wide, wide enough for 3 lines of swimmers
everybody swims "on the right" of course, occassionaly a faster swimmer passes you in the "middle lane"
... or almost everybody...
last time I almost bumped into a ghost swimmer... he said "oops"
... "oops"... really?
guess he was British ...

thirdly : spitters
while swimming too enthousiasticly, some of the swimmers get a bit of water in their mouth and spit it out
usually in the pool
last week on me
I'm not joking ... I got "sprayed upon"
he as well said "oops"

swimming pools... always an adventure

very abercrombie&fitch

Monday 5th of December:

I'm walking the corridors of my internship place (sounds much cooler than it is, believe me) when I. stops me.
I.: "there's a website I'd like to show you and E." (the three of us are the only women on the floor, for the rest it bursts of testosterone (this being a severe exageration if you would know the "males" on the floor)) - "maybe a good idea for a field trip tomorrow... after lunch or something".

I am of course curious and go check the website and find this...

... a line of fine half-naked young gentlemen advertising for the new Abercrombie&Fitch store in Brussels.

as architects and art historians we have an eye for esthetics and since details cannot be judged on a picture, we need to go there in person (and with 3 people you always see more than when you're alone) ;)

let's check it out tomorrow


Tuesday 6th of December:

the birthday of Sinterklaas (Santa Claus' predecessor, a very popular holy man in Belgium and the Netherlands who, accompanied by his black servants (from the soot of the chimney, no racist motives involved), distributes candy and presents to the little and older ones)

anyway... checking out the naked chests myself today will be a bit difficult, but there might be a chance I can see a glimpse of them while passing by when we drive towards one of Brussels' museums

we drive by...
locate the gigantic A&F banner
see the guys...

... wearing vests! OOooh THE WOOSIES

I'm disappointed now

we have a government

for how long? isderegeringalgevallen

the internship - part I: the governmental printer

situation sketch:

I'm sitting at my internship desk (I have my own office... as an intern... quite decadent no :)) working on the computer and I come across an interesting report

I click on the print button, select some pages (to save the environment, after all I am talking about a 600 page report) and press "print"

25 minutes later I realize "ow right, I printed something" (which is normal given my short term memory dementia, like Finding Nemo's Dory)
I walked to the printer room where some little light is blinking "out of toner"

I look around... no toner
I check with my colleague, she says the following words: "ah yes, ehm... is it urgent?" - "no, not really" - "then maybe it's best to wait until tomorrow, Y. or M. usually replace the toner" - "ah ok"

now, three days including a weekend later Y. nor M. showed up

so I'm still waiting to print...
and I feel like becoming an ambtenaar of the government myself (oh boy...)

the technological revolution - part I

we all know… in the past decades technology changed massively!

people are reachable anywhere, at anytime, at anyplace; we need internet connection everywhere; checking mailboxes happens digitally, in the real one we only find bills; music files became abstract; and to my personal annoyance we all use GPS (except for me and my dad, cause I hate it), nobody knows how to read a map anymore (except for me, even though I’m a woman) etc…

technology changed so much in so little time, the phrase “do you know how to get there” is without any exception (except for me and my dad) answered by “don’t worry, I have my GPS”.

technology’s revolution even moves people, namely Rand E., to make a very cool flash adobe presentation with an overview of yesterday, today and tomorrow (thank you, Rand).

one of Rands wishes for tomorrow got my attention: “indoor GPS”…

now before I will elaborate on that, let me describe my skepticism towards GPS:

- 1. two examples of human stupidity: about every 5 months, one finds an article in some newspaper about a fool who drove into a pond, river or canal because he was following his GPS instructions;

- 2. a former friend of mine was going to a local theme park, at a specific point there was a signpost leading them towards that theme park (to the right) while the GPS said “turn left”… they turned left, ended up hitting another car in an alley in the centre of the middle of nowhere (PS: he’s not my friend anymore, but for a different reason J)

- 3. some years ago I carpooled with my cousin to another cousins wedding… the first cousin had a new GPS… he knew how to get to our destination but used the GPS anyway… there were two possible highways to take… he took the second… the GPS took the first…

result: over a distance of more than 10km, where every 200 meters you can turn around, the GPS ordered my cousin to make a U-turn… for about 50 times!!! It’s safe to say I went nuts

now… back to the “indoor GPS”

before Rand could explain this particular idea for the future, my imagination of course went crazy…

- 1. indoor GPS: suitable for morning grumpies who tend to bump into every obstacle on their way to the bathroom: “in 1 meter beware for the sock you carelessly left about yesterday evening”

- 2. in case of a cold or illness manifesting in the bathroom: “make a U-turn”

- 3. in case of severe short term memory dementia: “start: front door; destination: toilet – in 3 metres, turn right, go up the stairs, continue straight on for 12 steps, turn right… you’ve reached your destination” (maybe look around and make sure you have actually reached your destination… GPS’s aren’t always perfectly accurate ;))

- 4. in case of dilemma what route to choose: “start kitchen; destination: bath room – 1. choose most economic route, 2. choose most indoor route, 3. choose shortest route” (in my opinion same route each and every time)

- 5. in case of… *poof* (sound of me pull out of my imagination)

… Rand: “indoor GPS: to easily link surveyed rooms together in an AutoCad drawing”

pff… boring… my ideas were cooler!

how to make people smile - part II

- after running for your life to catch a bus you didn’t wanna, but did miss, you can either stamp your feet or keep on running like you weren’t running for that bus that just left

- if you plan on falling on your ass (for instance on a snowy or icy afternoon) do it in style: with a triple salto mortale, land on the ground and bump up again… and then walk on like nothing happened

- dress up in a pink-purple spandex… especially when you’re called Pierce Brosnan at the end of the Mamma Mia! Movie

- and again… smile like you never smiled before

why I love my country – part I

some people seem to be born in the wrong country: a hectic Spanish guy, a punctual Italian girl, an ungründlich German

others are born where they belong, although spreading their wings is of course optional

you know I belong to this last category

why? one word: chaos

where? everywhere

part I: TRAINS

- during rush hour there’s is sadly enough a 90% chance of delay (reaching from 10 to 35 minutes or sometimes even more)

so you might think, “I’m losing time here on this stupid platform, tomorrow I’ll come 10 minutes later, I’ll still be on time”... now when you arrive the day after at the platform, 5 minutes late (not 10, just to be sure), Murphy WILL have struck, cause for 1 night (and 1 night only) your train was on time

- taking the same train every day doesn’t mean you take it on the same platform (right D. ;))   so if you find yourself running for that train cause your late again, do not jump randomly on the train you usually take: especially during rush hour there’s 50% chance you’ll end up in the middle of nowhere because of “spoorwijziging! the train of 8h03 in the direction of Ostend will depart from platform 4 instead of 1” (this message being broadcasted in the station in Dutch of course)

- as you all experienced before I suppose, those times when you’re tired the most and you reached your utter boundaries (so when you’re in need of a quiet train), you’ll find a group of girls that thought it was necessary to come sit next to you, chattering and twittering like a gang of chickens

- when the sign on the platform might say “don’t get in”, even when there’s no train to get in to... (am I supposed to look for an invisible Hogwards Express or something?)

- and last but not least, there are situations like this (notice the time):

the Kafka called NMBS/SNCB :D

... lovely J

date a girl that's broken hearted

she scares you away, she’s not ready to open up yet, at least you think so
she’s afraid to get hurt and you’re afraid to hurt her even more
the pain she’s feeling is worse than any physical pain, she’s telling you not to come closer

but she needs you
hurt her, she’ll get stronger
make her cry, she’ll be grateful cause in the end you’re a sign from destiny itself, telling her she’s worth it

then, fight for her, she’ll break down her wall
sooth her pain, she’ll know she can trust you
be the one who gives the sympathy she has been longing for

she has more love in her heart than before, she gives it entirely to the ones she cares for, so if you love her with all your heart, she gives 10 times more and you’re the luckiest man alive
she has so much courage, so much strength, she’ll inspire you
she has no regrets cause she knows everything happens for a reason

she believes only the good die young, but also that the good who survived will be rewarded for fighting, that faith and destiny will give her the most amazing opportunities
she lives every day to the fullest, she’s not content with anything, the sky is the limit, nothing less

she’s a mystery: when she dreams off, it’s not just a daydream, it’s a world trip along undiscovered horizons
she’s physical: when she meets friends, she really greets them, with a smile that says you made my day, with a kiss that says you’re very dear to me, with a hug that says I missed you so much
she’s driven: after going through the deep depths of her soul, she knows what it means to live

see the sparkles in her eyes when she dreams off, feel the passion in her hug when she greets you, experience the lust for life that shines from her

kiss her, make her fly
she deserves only the best, let her look for it

she misses him, very often
but she’s so much stronger than before
she’s mad at him
but she’s the one who opened up to new horizons
she often thinks about them together
but it’s his loss

and yours if you let her go


for Arnout VHD on his birthday, who saw my sparkles, who felt my passion, who experienced my lust for life… and who broke my heart

now you’ll have to live the misery of loosing what you had

but… thanks for making me a fighter


sincere thanks to Liesje, Than_I and all my friends for the love and support

as an answer to date a Greek girl by Than_I

the secrets of a lifetime - part III

we're not finished yet...
new secrets are revealed

we might have had an idea about it in advance...
all members of the (extended) family had more than one

what? glasses!
bomma and bompa had them, my dad, aunt and uncle had them since they were little, and their aunts and uncles had them
and remember... nothing was ever thrown away

result...

dozens of very hip glasses and sunglasses

look a bit more closely
- half a pair of glasses:

... for the masked ball maybe?

- two halves that used to be one: 

 ... to repair with tape?

 - a pair of glasses without glasses:

... to be used as a toy or for the local drama club?

- a pair of glasses with one glass:

 ... to... ehm... I really don't know

the relativity or fatality of disasters

each and every individual has his priorities

this makes sense…

to other individuals these might seem a bit weird, since that person has other priorities

that makes sense as well…

the consequence of these priorities is that there’s a wide range of disasters: from acceptable (losing an inherited piece of jewelry) to ridiculous (broken nail), from hideous (half a village swallowed by the earth after a quake) to “ehm… WHAT???” (pink suit for the chihuahua is sold out)

but let’s look at this subjectively for once

PART I – THE KOI

one of Belgium’s new-made celebrities Astrid B., with her own reality show, experienced a horrible disaster (her own words): one of her koifish died.

now, one could say, don’t be silly, buy a new one, you have more than enough money, consider it a welcome variation to purchasing Louboutins

but let’s not say that for once, let’s enter into her emotions

- first of all financially: it costs a lot of money!!! maybe up to 200€! that’s a lot of money! (this would be my argument, but since I’m not living in Hollywood, it might not count as an argument)

- second argument, a very strong one: after the decease of this particular koi, the bio-diversity of the pool is disturbed! at first we had 7 fish, now 6… that totally destroys the sanctity of the fauna… plus the leftover kois will be confused! since fish tend to have a short time memory (like myself, but that’s totally besides the point) losing one of their friends will be a problem: after having the chance of training their abilities to count to 7 before forgetting what they were doing, losing one of their mates will again cause a decay in memory capacities… cause right before they reach counting nr.7, a problem shows up… where is nr.7? now probably the fish won’t remember what they were doing, but they do remember the feeling of confusion… oh god, confused kois… where will that lead us :s

- thirdly: there might be now a serious decay in trust towards the neighbours’ animal residents… I didn’t mention this before but what if after a thorough crime scene investigation including brushes, dna and finger... sorry finprints and an autopsy points out the Chihuahua was the unsub? imagine the consternation, the loss of faith in the neighbours...  the drama!

… they will have to throw a serious amount of dinner parties to make up for it

what can they serve that’s appropriate… koi on the BBQ?

PS: if den John ever cheats on her, the kois will be involved: [I quote] “I will cut of the wee-wee, feed it to the kois, bake the fish and make him eat it”