coincidence? no way! part III

there is no such thing as coincidence

my life is the perfect example of this

I was alone, not just only me… partially me, cause Arnout took half of me when he left

how would I survive this? do I even want to get over this? cause that means accepting the break and I didn’t want to do that

but I had to go on, and I went on as good as I could

the post-graduate year started, immediately taking a run with lectures, project works, excursions, more lectures and project works, all this in the shortest amount of time you could possibly imagine

there was even no time to doubt my choice for this course

I paid attention in class and during excursions, worked my ass off for the projects; in the mean time keeping up my social life, meeting old friends, singing in my choir, and building up a new social life, with people that would turn out to be best friends

anything was good enough to fill up that black hole around my heart that was sucking up my energy

but that black hole was also sucking up myself

I was completely forgetting myself...

so my friends (and the little voice in me) dragged me along on my quest: find me, myself and I

I went looking for me next to a drink and my friends in a bar and discovered I love going out, I love to meet new people, talk to strangers and make them think “mmm, she’s special”

I went looking for myself on a city trip to Paris, the city of love, under a warm spring sun and discovered the love of my friends completes me

I went looking for I on the study trip to Petra, Jordan, and discovered my friendship is a blessing for other people

the way to finding myself was better than I could ever imagine: new friends, new people, new self-confidence… new me

now I look upon this last year, the hardest in my life, as the greatest blessing I ever had

THESE were the greatest months of my life

this break-up happened for a reason: for me to know what I want and what I’m worth

to get stronger, you have to get through the crap

to get higher, you have to go lower

there’s more to life then you would think at first

don’t be afraid to get hurt… I know it sucks but it makes you who you are

my friends are there for me and I’m there for them

I’m free as a bird now and I enjoy life

my old friends saw me open up

my new friends saw me grow day by day

and Arnout? no clue… he might be on the other side of the world, he might have shrunk down, he might be sitting in a corner crying over me :) … I don’t really care

I attract new people in my life with a smile

nobody special, just trying to be a little ray of light in the life of other people

… the end (for now, cause I’m always open for new things)