cold diesel

oh boy...

I should beat myself on the head with a stick (and everybody around me should do that too)

the intermediate thesis presentations are in less than three weeks and I have...
... nothing...

nothing in this case actually means nothing
it doesn't imply "I have part of my historical investigation, but it's close to nothing"
it doesn't mean "I took pictures of the entire building and put them in a ppt, but that's it"
it doesn't even comes down to "I have a clear view on my content, but nothing else"

it actually means nothing
a couple of books are surrounding me (like a gang of tigers approaching a wounded springbok), yelling "read me" - "no me!!" - "I'm more important"
I have to get started but each and every time I forget that getting started takes some time
like trying to get a cold diesel up to 180km/h in 5 minutes...

you'd think that a bit of deadline stress should get me going
unfortunately, for once it's shifting towards panic

not a slight form of panic, no... a massive panic scene à la Chicken Run (100 hens screaming and running around like a headless chicken)

oh boy... time management and me :(

ni goe bezig...